Christmas comes early!

The approach to Steve’s assessment is always an anxious period.  This time it has coincided with the run up to Christmas and a very intense period of work for me, so stress levels have been rising ……..Which is probably one reason why we set off to hospital this morning without taking the paperwork for Steve’s X-ray and appointment with the oncologist. On realizing this, we turned around and went home to pick it up, only to get stuck in a huge traffic jam where we could do nothing but sit and watch the minutes tick by, past his appointment time.  Had a horrible feeling this was not a good omen……


However, Steve was seen quickly in radiology when we finally arrived.  Then it was almost straight into the consulting room in the clinic, where the oncologist called by briefly to say hello, shake our hands, remark on how well Steve was looking, before moving on to this next patient and leaving us with the new registrar.  Smiles all round and a huge sigh of relief from us as she gave us the good news that the X-ray showed no sign of progression and Steve’s condition is still stable!  


So Christmas has come early in the Wride household! What better Christmas present could you wish for?  We can now throw ourselves into enjoying the festive season and will be breaking open a bottle of fizz tonight to celebrate :-))  Hope you will join us in a virtual toast, wherever you are!

Happy days

The last few blogs seem to have been invaded by a rather sombre mood.  Things have been much better recently!  


Last weekend we had a grown-up sleepover with Paul and Veronique, old friends from my days at the City Council. That was preceded by a wonderful meal and good company on Saturday night.  Many thanks to you all!


This weekend, we have been hosts to Helen and Rob who came down from Leeds on Friday night, braving fog and horrendous traffic, and Anne and Colin visiting who drove up from Chichester at the crack of dawn on Saturday morning. We have been putting the world to rights until the wee small hours over a good meal and several bottles.  We also managed to fit in a bit of culture, visits to long forgotten corners of Oxford and a walk along to Thames this morning for lunch at  riverside pub. Such good company and so considerate and helpful - in fact, perfect guests! 


Next week, Steve’s court case moves forward again.  We have not one, but two, meetings in the pipeline..  One with the solicitor and the other with our expert witness, who wants to be shown around the site where we believe Steve was exposed to asbestos nearly 40 years ago.  This is not quite how we had envisaged spending our lunchtimes next week, but it’s necessary for our team to be thoroughly prepared for the pre-trial hearing at the end of the month.  


There have been some interesting reports in the medical press this last week about a number of drugs which seem to be getting better results for mesothelioma than the standard treatment currently on offer. Finding a cure is still a long way off, but at long last, things seem to be moving in the right direction!


Lastly, a picture speaks a thousand words and I haven’t been posting many recently.  Time for a gallery feature soon, I think!

Remembering

All over the world on Wednesday and again today people have been remembering those who lost their lives in conflict.  Our hearts go out to those they left behind. 


We also remember those who survived the conflicts, only to have their lives taken prematurely as a result of exposure to asbestos; exposure which could have been avoided with the right precautions.  Steve’s dad numbers amongst those victims.  Our hearts go out to those they leave behind, including the wives and children contaminated by the lethal dust as they washed dirty work clothes unaware of the risks they were taking, or hugged their fathers as they returned home from work, and in the process breathed in the fibres that were to come back to haunt them as they hugged their own children many years later.  


We look back to the possible causes of Steve’s exposure in frustration, anger and in grief - natural emotions, in the circumstances - but probably heightened this last week by seeing so many poppies, not to mention the aftermath of going through the court papers.  Still that’s over now, at least for the time being. 


Steve’s next assessment is less than four weeks away - always a nail-biting time - so we are making the most of the here and now, including a wonderful meal yesterday evening with old friends Paul and Veronique, and a sleepover at their house so we could enjoy the wine and stay up till the small hours in good company without having to worry about the drive home!  


More get-togethers planned for next weekend and the weekend after and may be even in-between….isn’t it great to be sociable?  

No escape

If you are a film buff (or even if you’re not) the name Steve McQueen will probably conjure up memories of the actor making a bid for freedom by riding his motor bike over a barbed wire perimeter fence around a POW camp in the movie “The Great Escape.”


What you may not know is that today is the 30th anniversary of Steve McQueen’s death in 1980.  Of more significance for this blog, is the fact that he died as a result of mesothelioma after breathing in asbestos fibres when stripping out asbestos insulation from pipes in naval vessels as a mechanic in the US Marines, before his film career took off.  Mesothelioma is disease from which, even today, there is no escape in terms of a cure.


However, treatment has moved on a great deal in the last three decades.  I write today’s blog in the hope that my Steve, my very own hero, will be able to take advantage of the progress in treatments which may at least offer long term stability, if not complete remission from this horrible disease……And, of course, that goes for all the other meso warriors out there - and their families and friends - who are fighting for their own lives and the lives of their loved ones as I write, as well as for those who will receive the devastating news of mesothelioma diagnosis at some point in the future, the seeds having been sown already without their knowledge.


A rather sombre thought for today - perhaps it’s the effect of shorter days and darkness coming early……Anyway, we’re back at home now after a short break visiting family to cheer ourselves up after the marathon of going through the court case documents, and it’s still daylight!  Time to get on, unpack, and sort ourselves out ready for tomorrow, when “normal” life resumes with my return to work. 

a forest of paperwork

We collected a large box from the Royal Mail office last Saturday. Seeing it was from the solicitor, we put off opening it until Monday so that it didn’t spoil the weekend or Halloween.  That would have been Steve’s dad’s birthday, had he not died in his late sixties as a result of mesothelioma. But we had to face up to dealing with it eventually…..


Inside the box were two witness statements from one of the defendants in Steve’s damages case plus their related “exhibits”, and two large lever arch files stuffed with 60+ documents from the “Disclosure List”.  This box of delights was followed up by another bundle from the defendant’s expert witness, with yet more exhibits, which arrived at the start of this week.  A lot of paperwork to go through, but go through it we did. 


It took much longer than expected to sort, read and digest the various documents, and for Steve to write his observations on what we had seen and convey these to the solicitor. The journey through this forest of paper work took us on a roller coaster of emotions, but we got through it eventually.  During this process, the sequence of events going back to December 1971 which eventually lead to Steve’s mesothelioma diagnosis last June came into much sharper focus than ever before - memories were triggered and photos rediscovered, which was helpful. However, it also meant that the old wounds were reopened and salt rubbed in. Not surprisingly, we were feeling a bit tired and emotional by the end of it all.


Spending so much time on the court case was not what we thought we would be doing this week, our last at home together before I resume work on Monday after a very long break. But hey, it’s done. We’ve put the lid on the box and have taken ourselves off to wind down from the experience. It’s so tempting to put the lot on a bonfire tonight and enjoy the warm glow!  


Whatever you are doing tonight (or tomorrow) to celebrate Fireworks night, have fun, but please take care….






  

Milestones and celebrations

Looking back at the blog for 19 June 2009, three days after Steve’s diagnosis, I wondered out loud how much more time we would have together - would he be here for his next birthday, or mine?  Well, I’m delighted to say both of those milestones have been reached and passed.


No 3 on my birthday wish list blog on 29 July 2009 was that the Wride clan get together at Christmas would be the best yet - and it certainly felt great to be able to carry on the family tradition last year with the side effects of chemo wearing off and in the knowledge that Steve’s cancer was stable.  


Today we have reached another milestone - No 4 on the birthday wish list, both of us are here to enjoy celebrating Katie’s 21st birthday today

Happy Birthday Katie!

We will pop the cork tonight and raise a glass to you, with lots of love.  Have a great day - see you soon, we hope!

We’ll also be celebrating two other bits of good news - my big work report has passed the scrutiny of a peer group review with flying colours, so I don’t have the prospect of a major re-write on Monday.  Secondly, one of my photographs has been selected for the RPS 153rd International Print Exhibition, which opens in London in July, then tours round the UK for a year. Steve’s image Tulip Sky - blog 28 August 2009 - was selected last year, so I am delighted to be following in his footsteps with Lunch Box:

The next BIG milestone will be my significant birthday at the end of July.  Last year’s Birthday wish No 5 was that he would come with me to collect my buss pass and we would jog home together.  We shall see!

In the meantime, there are lots of other things to look forward to and enjoy, starting with the launch of Oxford Artweeks today and the opening of the WOCart exhibition this evening.  

I think we will be having more fun than Messrs Brown, Cameron and Clegg and their respective colleagues.  We live in interesting times……..

What a relief!

Inspired by the brave souls who crossed the channel on water skis, cycled the length of the UK and visited all the Six Nations rugby tour stadia by bike - not to mention Eddie Izzard’s marathon of marathons - we decided to do something ourselves for Sport Relief today.  

Rather than run one mile, we walked about five and a half miles to the Trout PH and back, stopping in the middle for a spot of lunch at the pub.  Our journey out took us along the west bank of the Thames where we were delighted to see a red kite flying low over the local allotments.  Perhaps it will visit our garden soon, like the jay that appeared in next door’s tree yesterday, the wood pigeon who seems to be making up a nest in the clematis outside Steve’s workroom window, and the coal tits and goldfinches who have been passing through recently. We came back via Port Meadow to enjoy close encounters with flocks of geese, and the horses and ponies grazing on the meadow.  

This was the route of our Boxing Day walk, when Steve had been aware of tingling and numbness in his fingers and toes, but it had not become the problem it was to develop into later, in January and February.  As well as doing our bit for Comic Relief, today’s trip was a test to see whether he could manage walking further than into town and back, in readiness to undertake an 8 mile walk in the Peak District next weekend to celebrate friend Andy’s 60th birthday.  We think the answer is yes, provided we can plan in an escape route for emergencies somewhere along the line! However, it will be a bit of a challenge for the knees as much as the feet and toes.  The body has seized up a bit after spending so much time sitting around in hospital having, and recovering from, chemotherapy. You’ll have to watch this space to see if Steve makes it!

Some other bits of news - Steve’s now edited his last issue of the West Oxford Newsletter for the local community association.  It’s not that he’s too unwell to continue to do it, just doesn’t want to be tied down to deadlines in the future - it stops us being more spontaneous, which is what we’re aiming for now…. He said his good bye on the back page, alongside a little bit about my photo of the local allotments winning the RHS Photography Competition.  The RHS result is also featured in this week’s edition of Amateur Photographer magazine and the current issue of Gardening Which?  Fame at last (!) Plus, I’ve had two images selected for Fotoblur Issue 5 Spring 2010, which has just been published http://www.fotoblur.com/magazine

Tomorrow we have a visit from the solicitor who is dealing with Steve’s claim for compensation.  Not sure why he is coming, other than that he wants to see the client face-to-face…up until now, it’s all by done in writing, by phone and via a third party (the chap who does all the legwork for the solicitor).  I think he will have a surprise when he sees how well Steve is looking for someone classed as 100% disabled.  


However, whilst remaining positive, we cannot overlook the fact that at some point in the future, life will get tougher. That was brought home to me when I read an article in the Guardian on Saturday by Lionel Shriver, the novelist who won the 2005 Orange Prize for Fiction. Her latest novel, So Much For That released on 2 March, Steve’s birthday, was inspired by her friend Terri, who died of mesothelioma. The article is about her relationship with Terri and how it changed after she was diagnosed with a terminal illness. Please read it, if you can spare a few moments, but take a deep breath first:


http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2010/mar/20/lionel-shriver-friend-cancer

Where do we go from here? Part 2

Yesterday, I tried to pull together some thoughts about surgery as a treatment option.  Today it’s the turn of radiotherapy.  


As far as I can make out, there are two types of radiotherapy : external beam radiotherapy (EBRT) or intensity modulated radiotherapy (IMRT) where computers control the radiotherapy machine to give a very specific dose to a cancer or specific areas of a tumour. Research in the USA indicates that patients who receive IMRT appear to have a lower risk of cancer recurrence (14.3%) compared to EBRT (41.7%).  If Steve has a choice between the two, then clearly it’s a no-brainer.  IMRT has the advantage that it can better target the cancer whilst sparing nearby organs from radiation exposure.  


Those of you who have followed the blog from early days will know that Steve has already had radiotherapy on the “ports” where the chest drain was inserted and the biopsy taken back in June, 2009.  This procedure reduces the risk of the cancer seeding into the scar tissue, which is a vulnerable area.  You can still see two circles where the exposed skin is a different colour from the surroundings, although the bright red sun burn colour has long since faded.  


In November 2009, researchers from Melbourne, Australia, reported that new radiation techniques may improve the life expectancy of mesothelioma patients.  This technique involves using higher-than-normal doses of radiotherapy, made possible by advances in technology and better equipment.  In the pilot study, on average the treatment has given patients an additional two years life expectancy, with no major side effects.  Where the cancer has retuned, it has appeared in a different place, enabling the same technique to be used again. Something to explore further with the consultant on Thursday, possibly…


Tomorrow, it’s time to look at chemotherapy….

It's the time of the season...

For some reason, the old Zombies’ song, Time Of The Season keeps going round and round in my head so, perhaps not surprisingly, it’s the theme for today’s blog.


The birthday season
Earlier this week Esme, our new great niece, made her appearance.  Any minute now, our neighbours Derek and Marie will become grandparents for the first time (thinking of you Hollie, up there in Glasgow!)  Next week it will be Steve’s turn. The period between Valentine’s Day and Steve’s birthday always seems to fly by, and this year is no exception.  Back last June when Steve was diagnosed with mesothelioma, it crossed my mind that he might not be here for this birthday.  But the thought was quickly set aside, and quite rightly so as it turns out. The birthday cake has been chosen, the fizz is ready to go on ice and in the next few days we’ll decide what to do on 2 March, and where to do it. Mmmmm, better get a present sorted :-)


The silly season
The Daily Mail has featured an article under the headline “The Great Asbestos Hysteria: How one man claims the BBC, profiteering firms and politicians have exaggerated the dangers of asbestos”  When will people learn?  There is no known safe level of exposure to asbestos fibres in the atmosphere, regardless of whether its white, blue or brown. Disturb the stuff at your peril, Mr Booker.  


The hospital season
It’s almost three months since Steve’s last visit to hospital, but we’ll be back again next week (thankfully not on Steve’s birthday) for another scan and X-ray, the results of which will be discussed with the consultant the week after. Must write the list of options to discuss…..


The season of red tape
Today’s post brought two letters - one from the solicitor giving us a progress update on the work they are doing on Steve’s compensation claim and asking for clarification of a note in his medical records which refers to two occasions when he was exposed to asbestos “at work” in 1969, possibly in Bristol.  We have no idea where that information came from (he was a student back then) so will need to dig a bit deeper.  The other letter was from the Inland Revenue enclosing a second notice of coding - still incorrect, even though I spent a small fortune on the phone earlier this week trying to sort out ….Here we go again….


The awards season
Well done Jack for reaching and EXCEEDING your fundraising target for cancer research by running in the Bath Half Marathon on 7 March.  Many, many thanks to all of you who have sponsored him. There’s still time to sign up - details under fundraising on the right hand side of the page. The weather has not been good for training runs, so Jack is not as well prepared as he hoped to be, but he will do it, of that you can be sure, and we will be there to cheer him on!


Not really an award, but hard on the heels of success in the RHS photography competition and IGPOTY (blog archive for 12 January and 18 February), a couple of my photos have been selected for publication in a photography magazine. More of that another time. 


Spreading the word
Steve’s story and a link to the blog is now on the Mesothelioma Info website, along with others who are sharing their experiences. To read about these brave people, click on the link on the right, then on the link to “Mesothelioma Stories”.


A busy week lies ahead - more on the birthday boy soon!